NOM Still Peddling The “Being Gay Is A Choice” Myth
June 14, 2012 2:57 pm ET by Carlos Maza
The National Organization for Marriage (NOM) continues to peddle the myth that gay people can simply choose to leave the “homosexual lifestyle,” and several of the organization’s top employees are becoming more vocal in promoting “ex-gay” talking points.
During a recent speech for the Alliance Defense Fund’s Collegiate Academy, NOM’s Dr. Jennifer Morse stated that she preferred to refer to gay people as “same-sex attracted,” a term made popular by proponents of “ex-gay” therapy:
MORSE: I have come to a point where I try to use the term “same-sex attracted” because I think it’s more descriptive, I think it’s more accurate. I’m willing to believe that there are people who are attracted to people of their own sex and for whom that is a permanent feature of their lives. I’m willing to believe that. But I don’t think it follows from that that you’re going to become quote unquote “gay.” Right? In other words, gayness has become a political identity as much as anything else. Right? And so you have a decision, wherever you are, whoever you are, however powerful your feelings of attraction might be towards person of your same sex, you have some decisions about how you’re going to behave, how you’re going to identify yourself and so on. So I think it’s safer to use the term same-sex attracted. [emphasis added]
On Wednesday, NOM’s Cultural Director Thomas Peters wrote about a new, widely debunked study by Professor Mark Regnerus which allegedly found that the children of gay parents were more likely to identify as gay than the children of heterosexual parents:
If gay people are “born that way” and this means they have a “right” to marry (which doesn’t follow) why does the Regnerus study find significant differences in sexual orientation based on family of origin?
If orientation is simply genetic (and not also based on environment, etc) why do children, for instance, raised by lesbians display such a higher likelihood of identifying as gay themselves? Shouldn’t the household they were raised in make absolutely no difference, if children are simply “born gay”, like we are constantly told? [emphasis added]
And over the past several days, NOM’s been promoting the story of a gay Mormon – Josh Weed – who chose to marry a woman and now claims to have a happy and fulfilling sex life. In a June 12 blog post, NOM excerpted a portion of Weed’s explanation for why he chose to marry a woman:
One of the sad truths about being homosexual is that no matter what you decide for your future, you have to sacrifice something. It’s very sad, but it is true. I think this is true of life in general as well. If you decide to be a doctor, you give up any of the myriad of other things you could have chosen. But with homosexuality, the choices seem to be a little bit more mutually exclusive. If you are Mormon and you choose to live your religion, you are sacrificing the ability to have a romantic relationship with a same-sex partner. If you choose a same-sex partner, you are sacrificing the ability to have a biological family with the one you love. And so on. No matter what path you choose, if you are gay you are giving up something basic, and sometimes various things that are very basic. I chose not to “live the gay lifestyle,” as it were, because I found that what I would have to give up to do so wasn’t worth the sacrifice for me. [emphasis added]
The group has previously relied on the testimony of an alleged “former lesbian” to advance the idea that gay people don’t really need marriage equality to be happy. If they just choose to stop engaging in gay behavior, the narrative goes, gays and lesbian can live happily ever after in heterosexual relationships.